Cookie Recipes + Poetry. Huzzah! :-D

So I've been reading this book, Anthro-Porn-Ol-Ogy, which is somewhere between an interesting look into THE-P-WORD in mainstream US culture and, uh, cosmo. Or Sex and the City. Or those chirpy guide-to-getting/being-married books I used to buy (actually *buy*) because I got such a kick out of them.

I have come to the conclusion that (A) the author is a bit of a twit - though it occurs to me that the author may be turning herself into a Character for the purposes of the story, and (B) that I associate my het side with being a useless push-over who doesn't stand up for herself and doesn't live her feminism where it counts.

This last bit is quite a little problem, I think.

I mean, it's like associating my creative/emotive/writer/singer side with being intelligent, well-read and interesting, and my efficient/good-at-saving-money side with being paranoid, dismissive and boring. Two sides. Same person.
Which, DUH, means that my dyke side is just as much of a stupid push-over when it comes to relationships, and I'm just as likely to land myself with a manipulative, needy, controlling woman as I am to land myself with that kind of a man.
For fuck's sake.
(On the plus side, chances are reasonably good that, if I'm ranting about The Patriarchy, a woman SO isn't going to feel like I'm attacking her, personally. That said, it's not like there wouldn't billions of other potential sore-spots just lurking under the surface, but at least *that* one wouldn't be on the plate).


*~*~*~*~*

I've sent you two letters
One a hymn
of thanks
One a promise
to read June Jordan
to keep on writing
to be brave
for you
(for me)

*~*~*~*~*

Longing, I want
your hands
on my body
your mouth
thrown open
moaning
Longing, I want to know
what to do to make you
shivergasp, tremble,
want me.

*~*~*~*~*

On the couch,
You at one end,
Curled casually around a cup of tea,
Me at the other,
Nervous,
Breathless,
Trying (too hard) to be the cool
socially aware
political activist
woman I think you want
trying (too hard)
to hide my desire
making inane conversation
and mistakes
to cover the fact that I want
your body
curled around mine
your mouth
soft-lipped and hungry
your breath
hitching
your touch
your kiss
your need

*~*~*~*~*


I can picture you - all too easily - singing the fishheads song with alternate lyrics, singing it in a sudden burst of carry-a-tune-able song, with your nearest and dearest, as you cut leaflets, or marker rally signs, sitting cross-legged on the ancient, slightly warped hardwood of your house/appartmentliving room floor.You are smiling to yourself, sharing that smile with those friends/lovers/sweethearts/comrades-in-activist-arms, at the silliness of singing about marxists and how good they taste. I have fallen for you, hard, already.

I have written letters in support of co-op brothels, abolishing unfair laws, and honouring treaties, because the mere thought of your (imagined) teacherly approval, the thought that (maybe) you would like me more, want my company more, maybe even want ME (if you knew me at all), if I were a better person - has given me reason enough to get off my own scrawny ass and make an effort, small and determined, for other people I don't know.

*~*~*~*~*

Self-improvement through crushes.

It's the wave of the future, I tell you.

I remember when I tried vegetarianism for a year or two. I never fully went veggie -- too many family dinners, for a start -- but I cooked only vegetarian food, tried to go all the way to vegan a couple of times a month, just to see if I could go A Whole Day without ingesting eggs/dairy/honey. (It generally didn't work - I'm far too fond of yoghurt/milk/kefir/icecream/cheese/cream/etc ... and baked goods that incorporate them... to give up animal products entirely).

Part of my reason was because a friend of mine eventually responded to my statement "I'm thinking of going vegetarian" with a disbelieving "Still???" -- when that happens, you know it's time to stop considering and actually DO IT -- But the main reason (the reason I started considering it in the first place) was because I had a crush on a vegan.

<*insert eyeroll here*>

So I learned how to bake without eggs, and found out that I can make one heck of a nice stew using romano beans plus the celebrated What Have I Got In the Fridge approache. :-)

Self-Improvement. Through Crushes.

I find that this crush (on that kick-ass poet from toronto) is resulting in the same sorts of things.
Which is good.
As far as I'm concerned. :-)

*~*~*~*~*

( More Thoughts on the Dream House )

*~*~*~*~*

Anyway. General madness, as all things go.

Two sets of people are looking at my house today. One has been and gone already, the other is coming at 6:30.

I'm going to run errants (and/or surf the internet) until I can go home.


Things I've done today:

- Washed my kitchen floor

- Writen to INAC regarding the honouring of the Barrier Lake Hydro agreements

- Writen to That Guy at Public Works asking if he's got any research positions he needs to fill (he's out of the office until the 21st of July, so it'll be a while before/if I hear back from him, but I figured I'd ask).

- Eaten home made cookies (Mmmm... White!chocolatechip-amaretto-peanutbutter and mocha-chocolatechip... Very tastey...)


( Cookie Recipes )

*~*~*~*~*

Anyway, I think that's it for me. :-)


- TTFN,
- Amazon.

P.S.: Check this out.

Further to yesterday's link: The Brothel Around the Corner.

And (sort of) regarding legalization vs decriminalization.

More on Canada. Here's hoping.

- TTFN,
- Amazon.


[1] Bitter much?